January 9, 2010 - Saturday
 | Category: Life  Click Here for Flowers Comments This year, has been a very rough year for me. It's taught me a few lessons along the way. Take the good with the bad and a shot of tequila to blow it off. I am beginning to feel that life is hard but things will get better with time and patience. Sometimes, I am bit anxious about meeting the right person. After all ---no one really wants to be alone; least of all me. I like being in relationships and feeling loved and spoiled (haha).  BLESSING: I know that God has chosen someone for me; and that he will turn up at the right time. I know that I am about 90% better. My head doesn't bob as much as before. I have very few ticks. I don't cross my mouth when speaking or flutter my feet. My arms aren't' stiff and constantly moving. There was a time when the only way I could communicate with my mother on a bad day was to blink and nod quickly. The movements were stiff and rigid. I was in constant pain. My neck hurt some much and the only thing that stopped the ticking was Ambien and lots of sleep. I can climb the stairs better and with a little less pain. Most of movements / ticks are gone now except I tsk tsk every now and then or click with my tongue. But that only happens to me when I'm nervous or thinking about something unpleasant or painful. I am self sufficient and living in my own place with my cat Hazel.  I wonder at times if I can still become a nurse. I know that I am intelligent, but I don't know if I can handle the stress of school and studying. Yet, I have to try..... Mainly to finish what I started and to prove to myself that I still can. I am returning to New Mexico in the summer to go back to the Santa Fe Community College. I don't know what kind of work I'll be doing, but I know it will be in a hospital environment. I love taking care of people. That is instilled in me by god. My god given gift. Sometimes, when we suffer in life. It's often times to teach us to be more humble, caring and giving. But most of all....Be grateful for the blessing even the little ones. There are people who have suffered greater then myself. So, I have to kick myself every now and then to remind me that it's not that bad. I feel for the poor and the hungry. I think about the people that don't have anywhere to go; especially on a cold night. Someone is going to bed hungry tonight. Someone is sleeping on the floor. Someone has lost a great love or child. So no more Hermit.... Its time for me to live again. Forget the past..... Because it is exactly that. (PAST).. I can still dream of a beautiful life full of happiness and love with the people that are in my life now. My last blog was bitter, but I was hurt... who hasn't been hurt... No more pity party... Once a few years back I was speaking to a woman who was a minister and a patient. I told her that I felt like I fell from gods grace.... She told me.... (Then DONNA! GET UP! GET UP!) So from my heart to your heart...... GET UP! ITS OK..... YOUR BLESSED..... YOU CAN DO ANYTHING.... YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES... JUST GET UP! May the Angels that watch over me keep you and your family as well. May God smile on you again..... Because you are exactly as he intended...... BEAUTIFUL....... Donna Cynthia Ledesma "Joseph Studio 16"" Memorial Angel Seated Figurine" |
No comments:
Post a Comment